Phantom of the Mall: Eric’s Revenge (1989)

“Look what you did to me!”

OK, that quote comes late into the film, but it’s a doozy. Phantom of the Mall should have been one of those movies that aren’t as entertaining as they ends up being. But this tale of love and revenge is pretty fun, not to mention it captures that little part of the late 80s when the newly hyphenated words stone-washed meant something good!

Basically a modern exploitation re-imagining of Phantom of the Opera (duh!), this time the protagonist is a teenage girl with no creative talent; instead she has a knack for holding down two jobs at the newly built mall. The mall, by the way, now stands where Eric’s home once was. Seems some unscrupulous types wanted the property so they could put up said mall and torched Eric’s house, leaving him for dead. Unbeknownst to everyone in town, Eric has been hiding out in the mall’s ventilation system, scarred and very angry. Where he lived before the mall was constructed is beyond me, but should I really be asking such thought provoking questions when watching something titled Phantom of the Mall? Uh, I think not…

A pretty silly idea executed with only mediocre results, this movie still manages to maintain an enjoyable vibe thanks to the fine cast, many of whom went on to work in far more fabulous projects. Just look at the roster of famous (and infamous) actors including Ken Foree, Morgan Fairchild, Rob Estes, Gregory Scott Cummins and Pauley Shore. Fans of late 80s horror will also recognize Derek Rydall as Eric himself. Derek was the hot hunk of such low budget fare as Popcorn and the underrated Night Visitor before fading into obscurity. He’s not given much to do here except simulate sex with Playboy Playmate Kari Whitman and scream the above referenced quote. And unfortunately, he plays a scarred mutant here so the ladies don’t get much of a chance to ogle his lovely face. Mores the pity for that…

Perhaps a little unfairly maligned, Phantom is one of those movies you’ll either love or hate… or think is OK…. or not… who knows? The cast is up to the task, it’s fun and even “The Weasel” couldn’t ruin it for me!